Super Weight Loss Plan

Mr. Fred, who is the fattest guy in his locality, wanted to lose weight. He searched the internet, saw T.V., went to body building centers but his weight remained the same. One day Fred saw a T.V. Add about a weight loss plan. He was super exited. He signs up for the junior level weight loss plan. It promises weight loss of 15 pounds in a week'
 Next day at his house, a beautiful naked blonde wearing only a pair of running shoes came with a board in her hand saying "if you catch me,I'm yours". Fred started running at her. She ran and he couldn't catch her.

This continued for a week. At the end of the week the company came and recorded the weight. He lost 15 pounds. Happy with the programe, he signed up for the premium weight loss plan. It promises weight loss of 20 pounds a week.


Next day a two beautiful red heads stood naked with a pair of running shoes and a board saying "if you catch us we will be yours". Fred tries to catch them but fails. This goes on for a week. This time he almost catches them. At the end of the week the company records his weight and finds that he lost 21 pounds. He was super exited.
 He wanted to take the master weight loss plan. It promises weight loss of 30 pounds. But the company made him sign life insurance. They said it was dangerous. Fred said that he was ready for it. Next day at Fred's house, he was waiting for the girl. But a man with 300 pounds in a pair of running shoes and a big cock erection stood at his door with a board saying "if I catch you, you are mind". Fred ran for his life. Fred was supposed to lose 30 pounds but he lost 39 pounds!!!

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Emotional Fool

After a long time five friends met each other. They all were very happy. But in their school days they were the headache of their parents and teachers. One day they all decided to go out and they went to a five-star hotel for dinner. After dinner, the manager came with the bill. They looked at each other's face, who's going to pay.














First friend: I'll pay.Second friend: No, I'm going to pay.

Third friend: Oh hello!! I'll pay.

Fourth friend: What are you doing guys. Give the bill to me, I'll pay.

Fifth friend: Shut up you all!! Let me pay.

Watching this, the manager became very emotional and very happy to see their friendship. He said, ''I'm very happy to see your friendship. Always be like that and i'm going to give you a 20% discount.''

Third friend: Thank you very much!! But we are in dispute who will pay.

Fifth friend: Ok, let's make a race and the winner will pay.

The manager agreed.

All friends came to the starting point and waited for the race to start.

Manager: Ready!! On your mark!! Get set!! Run!!!

First friend: Run!!!

Second friend: Run!!!

Third friend: Run!!!

Fourth friend: Run!!!

Fifth friend: Runnnn........!!!


The manager is still waiting for the winner!!!!!

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From her to him

Love is the most cheerful and painful thing at the same time.
We hear that love doesn't kill anyone, but we kill ourselves by hyper reacting.
Being alive doesn't mean that you are intact, it's all up to your soul whether it's satisfied and happy or dead and musty inside.
That's the real criterion which affirms your humanity...
Are you a human still or did you become a zombie??














Let's read carefully what she says.

I am not alone...
I have me beside me...
I got me supporting me...
I am always here for me...
I will never leave me...
That's what I thought of myself, but I was wrong...
I left myself... I don't know whether I left it or it got lost...
I have no shadow as if I am not existent...
I am not breathing though... Am I dead yet?
No, I think I am still alive as I can can feel the pain invading me inside...
This rusty salty scarlet blood which fills my mouth every time I cough proves that I still have the blood running through my veins...
* * cries and shouts * *
* * coughing and bleeding * *
I wasn't alone...
I had you beside me...
I got you supporting me...
Where are you? I.......
What's the point of living if you aren't a part of this life?
I always thought that I love you from my heart, but that was a stupid naive thought...
My heart is too small to contain that much feelings I have for you, that poor heart would explode...
I have my love for you in my blood running through my veins feeding my organs and parts...
Just like the sea... You are riding my blood waves through my body...
I am feeling cold not heat... I am thirsty... I am drowned... I am lost...
Now I'm waiting and waiting... For God's mercy and relief... May I find the peace...

Let's pray for her so that she gets what she aims for...

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